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Saturday, 29 September 2012

The Annual Fooshba Award
It wasn't that long ago (April '11) that we talked about big hair. Yet, I feel a hankering for another round.  There's just nothing better than those big domes of hair, oftentimes appearing to defy gravity with vast curls spiraling into the upper reaches of the atmosphere.  The decades of the sixties and seventies were home to mighty swaths of hair curled and folded upon itself beyond reason and wigs that needed shanks of rebar to maintain their girth.

So what happened to the big hair? Well, it certainly has never completely gone by the wayside.  Indeed, the eighties had its fair share of hairsprayed cranial monuments.  But it gradually became looked upon as tacky non professional. “Today’s Woman” simply doesn’t presume the feminine vanity of gargantuan hair styles.  She’s got better things to do, dammit.





Plus, wigs have gone completely out of favor.  Wigs were perhaps the main culprit in the preponderance of beehive behemoths – just ask Dolly Parton.  Today, enormous wigs are the domain of scary televangelist dames.  (And please note that wigs were by no means exclusive to women – guys wore ‘em more than you might think.)


Let’s face it, in today’s fast paced world, who has time to manage a big-ass head of hair? Americans are so overworked and so preoccupied by sports, food, sex and celebrity worship we can barely squeeze in time to sleep and murder each other.  Hours spent doing one’s hair is simply off the table.





What’s interesting is mankind’s odd relationship with the hair atop their heads.  The powdered wig trend of the eighteenth century has to be among the strangest phases. After that, super-long hair suffered a dry spell until the counter culture movement in the twentieth century.  Of course, hippies were quick to point out that Jesus had long hair despite the older generation’s disapproval of it.  

In the seventies, long (often unwashed) straight hair parted down the middle was the style for women, while mighty afros for blacks were the standard cut.  




Twiggy not only inspired the skinny framed look in the latter half of the sixties, she also inspired many women to cut their hair short.  




Jackie Kennedy inspired thousands of women to sport the bouffant, and Jennifer Anniston, decades later, popularized the layered look...... but none will ever compare to the hair style craze inspired by Farrah Fawcett on Charlie's Angels.  Holy shit. Every girl was sporting one, and the style even became named after her: "The Farrah Do" or just "The Farrah".



Basically the style goes like this: (1) approximately shoulder length, (2) layered around face (3) feathered back, (4) flipped, and (4) bangs.  Blow dry the shit out of it (upside down) and hairspray. That's it.

It was everywhere in the late seventies and lasted into the early eighties. Speaking from a heterosexual male perspective - it is an extremely attractive look for a woman. They say it's coming back, but it's a much more modest, conservative, restrained version that doesn't even deserve the Farrah namesake. 


Well, I could ramble on and on, but I'll stop here (I'm hungry and the needs of my stomach trump the need to finish this post).  Until next time.



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